Changing Mantras

There are three boxes floating around in Vietnam that can't be delivered. They've been there two months. They couldn't clear customs, they couldn't be delivered, they were being sent to the wrong place, the wrong person. Three lonely little packages that were forgotten by one very crazy VP are sitting in a room designated for "terrorist paraphernalia". They contain t-shirts...of poor quality cotton.

I yelled at people in English, they yelled at me in Vietnamese, in Korean, in Chinese too - probably. Everyday I'd start by making a call to UPS US, then UPS Vietnam, then UPS Singapore. By 10AM I would be hoarse, crazy and no closer to getting the three boxes where they needed to be. By 2PM my crazy VP would have yelled at me too - in English - and I would be plotting interesting ways to murder him with poor quality cotton and a piece of cardboard.

Two months of this I kept my morale up by thinking: I'm going back to school. I'm going back to school. I will get my degree, I will get a job that has nothing to do with being an assistant. I will never have to chase a man down the I-95 to give him his laptop. I will never have to track someone else's packages through the rural areas of a small Asian country. I am going back to school!

Today I finally started filling out my work forms (again, thank you HR for dragging your butt on that!) and doing the math. Let's see, one class - three credits...that won't be so bad. Okay, and one consolidation fee. Well okay, you need to keep the roof from failing down. 14.4%. I said keep the roof up...not put on a new one. And a lab fee. A lab fee? For what? I'm taking a math class. There is no lab. One lab fee - $50. Fine, three credits, one consolidation fee, one lab fee...so thats...And a parking fee. For what? You don't have any parking lots! And a student services fee. Student Services? What are you going to do...give me another free pencil? And out-of-county fees. Hang-on...I live here! Out-of-county fees and 14.4% of that. And then? Book fees. Three books. It's one class. Three books and a professor made cd - $30 I can make a cd for 75 cents...how can you charge $30 for a powerpoint presentation? And a water fee. A water fee? In case you use a water fountain. You are charging me for something I may use? Yes. What now...want me to open a vein too. Three pints please. What?!?!? And 14.4% of your lung.

Now the one thing keeping my morale up at work is the thought: At 5PM I am going to have a beer. At 5PM I am going to have a beer.