People watching

We went to see Corpse Bride last night. It was cute - the trailer for Harry Potter looks awesome. These facts and opinions are not the purpose of this post.

We sat in front of a group of girls, or women, probably my age or a little younger before the movie. Their chatter was idiotic and for some reason it ticked my husband off. Of course he didn't want to talk with me and ignore the girls so he sat around being grouchy, swearing every time I tried to bring up a new topic and in general working towards his premium membership in Oscars's Grouch Club. Seriously...I'm buying him a trashcan for Christmas. And an elephant...

Despite my partner's melancholy I still enjoyed listening to the little girls prattle. The best part of the whole conversation was this little gem:

"I haven't spent anything. I mean I could move out, but why spend money on a place of my own when I can live in hell for free."

"With your Mom?"

"Yeah, for free."

Indeed.

However, though our movie was spent surrounded by discontented youth, our dinner before the movie was spent surrounded by babies. One particular baby. She was adorable. While her parents argued over fajitas or taquitos she devised the most fascinating game ever. She took a folded napkin, grabbed hold, moved it up onto the table and smiled. She then proceeded to move the napkin back down to her high chair. And then up to the table again. Then back down. I was enthralled. I could not figure out where the joy in this game came from - but it was certainly there because she did it for the better part of 15 minutes. Impressive - especially for a baby.

When the food came she decided that all tortillas taste better when eaten off one's wrist. And in the process of placing the food on her wrist then gnawing on her mexican-flavored arm my husband caught her eye. The little vixen. We waved.

"Smile." I directed my normally gruff-faced husband. He did. Then went back to his beer.

The baby kept looking.

"You must be funny looking." I stated.

"Must be." he mumbled into his enchilada.

The fact is, he must exude something unseen to normal people. For some reason he attracts the undivided attention of small babies and deadly predators - such as jaguars, tigers, and really mean swans. Having a wife who is, shall we say, kitty-crazy, we go to see the big cats a lot. And every time we do they always follow C. It never fails. I'm not sure if they feel he's a threat to their territory or would just make a pretty good midday snack. Regardless, it's freaky the way they look at him. I swear their eyes glow red.

It's also a little disconcerting how long babies will stare at him. The girl last night did not take her eyes off him till we left. Is this because he looks grouchy? Does it worry the kids that he's such a sourpuss? Is it the fact his hair looks like it'd be fun to pet? (And it is very fun to pet.) Does he have an aura that magnetically attracts babies with little communication skills? Maybe it's cause he's got that round baby face stuck on a very not-baby body.

Whatever it is I sometimes worry that uncaged babies will try to eat him one day. That'd be just awful.