My girlfriend and I are taking "stripper" classes for fun. A little lapdance, a little crawling on the floor and few spins on the pole. Once again I find I am a natural at the ultra difficult moves on the pole. I can swing and hook and swivel in 6 inch heels with the best of them...yet still can't put a car into shift fast enough to go up a hill (rather than down and backwards).
Sitting with my hunny and eating chicken I'm thinking about how much fun it was to swing around that golden pole and snake all over the place.
"What would you think if I stripped for awhile after I lose my job?"
"Huh?"
Clearly my husband hasn't been sharing in my pole day-dream. Pity.
"Just for a little while. My friend in San Diego did it after she bought her boobs, to pay them off, and she said is was the most fun she's ever had." (Well it was a friend of a friend, but she did buy boobs, and she did strip to pay for them.)
"Have I ever told you no?" My husband says a tad more seriously than fits a conversation like this.
"You've never said no, you've just likened what I wanted to do to the act of someone really stupid."
"No I haven't." sigh Sometimes I wish I had tape recordings of all the conversations we've had so I could point out what he thought of my University of Phoenix idea, I believe the word asinine and incompetent were applied. Not to me, but to those who had the same idea as me. That is till he decided he wanted to try it too...then it was a good idea.
Men.
"Don't strip, bad stuff happens and I don't want you with that crowd."
"But the girls I know are pretty down to earth."
"I've never said no to anything, but this is as close as I'll get to saying no."
And he says I'm passive-aggressive.
"You don't really want to strip anyway right? You're just trolling."
I think about this. I really do like dancing and I loved performing, but then it lacks a certain something that real dance and drama had. It lacks a certain type of theatrics.
"Well I'd like burlesque."
"Yeah that was cool, you could do that. But not a strip club...besides the ones here are sleazy."
That's true, strip clubs on the east coast have a kind of boys in the back room/these are my cousins' panties kind of a vibe.
"So not stripping, but burlesque, if someone started a burlesque."
"Yeah, you could do that. You'd be good at it."
Later, after chicken, he's getting ready for a haircut or something as I play with the kitty. He looks at me worriedly.
"You're not really gonna strip are you?"
"No," I say while I rub the kitty's tummy, "I'm not going to strip."
However, I think, I do reserve the right to remove my clothes in public!
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4 comments:
You're not going to strip? Well, now I have to convert my money back from the dollar bills.
i hate the university of pheonix. I think all men are like that, lol! Sonds like a fun class. I am way too fat to ever strip! I wouls wiggle in the wrong spots!!
Now, this is a post that clearly needs to have pictures included. :)
b, hey you can still give them to me. I'll exchange them...for a nominal fee.
dawn, I actually learned that wiggling is good for you. Jiggling is even better. Because the more you shake and jiggle and wiggle the smoother your skin gets. No cellulite, all tone. And...it's fun.
Fred, For my next post I take up the idea of posting slightly inappropiate picture of myself on the web with the husband...that'll go over real well!!!
Fred (the other one), I've posted at your blog before the whole e-books thing. :P I'm just quiet when I have...well...nothing to say. Heh. And yup, blame it on Dawn.
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